New Olivia words

So we have a few new words floating around the household. Miss Olivia now says "Cheese" and "keys." She happens to love both of these items, so learning to say them seemed to come easy for her. And yes Dave is still waiting for "Dada" to show up one of these days, but she still isn't interested in saying Dada...she simply calls him "Mama". When Olivia was just a wee baby I used to wonder how on earth she would even learn words....and how would I know how to teach her? This used to baffle me....I just couldn't see how it would all work. Well although we have a long way to go I'm starting to see how this motherhood thing works, and basically I've learned that you end up suprising the heck out of yourself. As we're getting closer to Olivia turning one I'm really starting to take stock and look at this whole year. My only advice to any mom is the same advice that my dad always gave me, and I told Rachel about it earlier today. Whenever I would have a problem in life, or want to learn something, my dad would always tell me to get a book. He would never offer insight until I had researched what I was going through. This has helped me throughout my life becuase I usually don't think about doing something until I've looked into it.

On another blogworthy note, I am now heading back out to the work world, well the part time work world anyway. I landed a job for a local health system, working as an Oncology Social Worker in a Cancer Center, 20 hours a week. I am peaceful about the job, and feel happy about it, although sad that I'll miss 20 hours of Olivia's life every week. I think about my mission as a mom, and hope that in the end this was the right decision for my family. I have a peace about it, but it certainly wasn't made easily. I had a goal of staying home with Olivia for her first year on earth, and I made it to almost 11 months. Just shy of my goal, but not a moment sooner for Dave who has been carrying alot of additional stress, cutting lots of corners, and basically forgoing lots of needed items so we could give Olivia the gift of her mom for almost one year. We've been pretty near broke over these last 10 months, but I feel so happy that I was with Olivia through most of her first year. I left my job last August, knowing that I didn't want to return there as I wasn't happy in the first place. I knew that I wanted to find something better, and had a peace inside that I would find it. I'm hoping this is the something better that I held out for, and financially it will help immensly. Thankfully Olivia will mostly be with her grandparents in my absense, and you can't ask for better caregivers than that, and I'm quite sure this will be a cherished time by both Olivia and my in-laws. Turning her over to their care 20 hours a week also takes a letting go on my part, and I've worked through some of that, and will continue to work through it as we re-adjust.
I will miss my days with olivia, but hopefully I will still have two of them where I won't be working....the schedule is being determined this week. In everything I do I really think about it and how it aligns with my values, ethics, and beliefs...you really wouldn't want to walk in my head sometimes. :) I make descisions with my heart and soul, so this took some tugging, but mostly it has been peace filled. I felt love and peace as I proceeded with this particular position, and also feel gratitude that it aligns with my values and beliefs for the type of work that I'd like to be doing. I used to make descisions based on money, and over the last few years have tweeked that thinking to what would work with my family, and what I could live with, walk with, and be proud of as a woman, wife, and mother. I have to answer to my life like we all do, and I have to answer for my descisions and why. Thankfully this is one that I can peacefully answer to, so wish me luck as I get started!