These boots were made for Walkin

Thanks to grandma Chop, Livy now has some snow boots! I can't wait to let her play in the snow. :)

Work Post

I rarely blog about my job, or go into much detail about it because people usually glaze over after I really start telling them what I do. As anyone who reads this blog knows, I work in a Cancer Center as a radiation oncology Social worker. People typically receive radiation everyday for 7 weeks, and I usually meet them during their first few days. I love hearing about their lives, how they spend their days, what hobbies they enjoy, what things they've accomplished, and how they're really handling their diagnosis. Many of them welcome me into their world, and keep me updated on how they're feeling, and the goings and comings of their life. Along with getting invited into their life, I often get to hear their biggest fears, or work through their biggest fears coming true with them. Each of my patients is living and walking with so much, and there are some days where patient after patient has a story that is sadder than the one before them. People have a hard time discussing and dealing with life and death. I say that people glaze over because the minute that I tell them that I am a Social Worker in a Cancer Center they look intrigued and want details. The minute I start describing what I do they just look blank for a moment. I think its becuase we all fear cancer and death, so my job requires that I deal with both of these things interchangeably, and all day long. My escape and breath of fresh air is talking to co-workers, or calling a friend for a few minutes to get my mind off an especially sad situation.

Today I had an especially sad situation. I have a 38 year old mother of 3 diagnosed with breast cancer. I thought her outcome sounded good and I try and see her at least once a week because I know that she is a mother, wife, employee, caregiver for her own mother, and has alot of emotional issues going on with her diagnosis. Today we were discussing her case and her doctor shared with me that her chances of seeing age 40 are slim to none. What ??? I was shocked. She has a 3 year old daughter, and two other school age children. I thought of all the implications of her death and I just felt so sad. Then a few minutes later she came in for treatment and seemed so happy because she had a great holiday, and at that moment I felt so heavy in my heart becuase I was holding something about her life that she wasn't aware of. She'll never know what the doctor told me, and she might defy the odds, but according to this doctor she has no shot at survival. She has a rare form of cancer and long story short, they have never seen someone survive 18 months passed the time of diagnosis with this type of cancer. I just kept thinking of her kids, and how they don't even know that they might all be on borrowed time together. I know that God will take care of them, but my sadness is probably a normal reaction to a difficult situation. My co-workers heard the statistic and just went on with their day, and I then reminded them that she has a 3 year old, plus two other children. One of my co-workers said "The show must go on." Geesh...hows that for compassion.

A day like today feels more emotionally challenging than others. I wouldn't trade what I do, but I wish that I could have more of an impact on people. I wish I knew of a technique they could do to increase their chances of survival. It is difficult at times to be the only Social Worker at the Center because there is no other co-worker to debfief with. Thankfully I recently got invited to be part of a larger network of Oncology Social Workers for bi-weekly meetings and support. I think this came at a good time for myself, as I can stay current on what is available to patients, and get the support that I need.

Homeopathy heals

I have to credit homeopathy for making Olivia better. I wasn't aware of the immediate healing powers of homeopathy, but my curiousity is definetly peaked now. This last week has been emotinally and physically draining because our poor daughter was suffering from a very nasty virus. It started last Thursday, and as of yesterday afternoon at 1pm, it was showing no signs of giving up. Olivia was running fevers up to 104, and had a sore throat. The virus was a sore throat virus called Pharingytis(sp), and our pediatrician said that Olivia probably had razor sharp pains in her throat 24/7, and there was almost nothing that could be done. No antibiotics can be given, and the only reccommendation was to give her tylenol and motrin.

Those of you who are parents know how heart wrenching it is to watch your child screaming in pain, and feel so helpless becuase there is nothing that you can do. Every nite we were calling the on-call pediatrician begging for a solution. They just kept reccommending cold popsicles and the tylenol. We just felt awful. We were laying hands in prayer over her, and asking God to please give Olivia something that would lift this virus from her. We were seconds away from going to the emergency room on Tuesday evening when all of the sudden she opened her mouth long enough to let us sneak a bit of popsicle down her throat. None of us slept for 4 nites in a row, and by Wednesday morning I think we all had had enough.

I ended up going into work for a few hours to try and catch up on a few things. My in-laws came over and Olivia seemed very happy to see some new faces since she hadn't been out of the house, or had visitors in a few days. I left for work at 10am, and around 1:30 pm my mother in law called me and said that Olivia's lips were turning blue, she had blotches all over her entire body, and she was shaking very badly!! I raced home and then raced her to the doctor. This would be our 3rd trip to the pediatrician in 3 days. When we got there she immediately did a full exam of Olivia and said that she was turning blue as result of her fever spiking dangerously high. There was nothing to prescribe becuase this was a virus, and virus's dont respond to medicine. I can't believe that noone has invented something to kill a virus! Anyway, the pediatrician then asked me to try a homeopathic remedy called Apis, and she would call us later that evening. She had asked me about 50 questions about Olivia's exact symptoms, and felt confident that this remedy would work. We have a pediatrician who does integrative medicine, as she is both a pediatrician and naturapathic doctor. She isn't quick to prescribe homeopathy, but she was certain that it would help Olivia. We were left with nothing else, and she had assured me that if the remedy wasn't the right one than it would do nothing, but IF it was the right one then Olivia would be back to normal within one to 3 hours. My mother in law had come to the peditrician with me and even she also felt comfortable with what Dr. K had reccommended. This made me feel better because Maria has the gift of discernment, and she was so pleased with Dr K.

I don't know much about homeopathy, but always wanted to learn more about it. Herbal remedies are different, and they take much longer to work, but homeopathy can have almost immediate results if the remedy is right. To make a long story short ,I visited my friends at Natural Oasis Market as they are so knowledgeable. They were quick to point out that I only visit them in a crisis, as the last few times I've been there I've been getting remedy's for my mom and Niki since both of them suffer from migraines and have long drives home. FYI they sell a product called "Migraine Relief" and it works wonders. Anyway they had Apis in stock so we gave it to Olivia right away, and by the time I pulled in the driveway she had no fever, her color was normal, and she wanted to eat and drink right away. She was back to herself...it was as if she was transformed. At 2pm her fever was 104, and at 3:30 it was nowhere to be found.She was playing, laughing, dancing, and babbling which were things that she hadn't done over the last few days.

That nite Olivia slept like a log and was in no distress at all, and has been back to herself all day today. I am so grateful that our doctor practices integrative medicine. She called us at 830pm that same day to see how the remedy worked, and she was so pleased that Olivia was healed. She is never quick to credit one specific thing, but she agreed in our case that homepathy deserved the credit since this virus had its hold on all of us.

We are so grateful to God for working through our doctor, and grateful to our doctor for being trained in both medicines. We have alot to be grateful for today.

Happy Thanksgiving

God, when I have food,

help me to remember the hungry;

When I have work,

help me to remember the jobless;

When I have a home,

help me to remember those who have no home at all;

When I am without pain,

help me to remember those who suffer,

And remembering,

help me to destroy my complacency;

bestir my compassion,

and be concerned enough to help;

By word and deed,

those who cry out for what we take for granted.

Amen."

The Grad School Crew

Today we had our "quarterly" grad school alumni get together. Our get togethers started before any of us had children, and from the pics you can tell that a few more additions have joined our alumni family. We used to have the comfort of sitting around, eating, and talking about anything and everything in our lives. We still get to do that, amidst a giant play date. :) It is always so great to see everyone, catch up, and eat some really great good. Molly we sure missed your taco dip, but Sarah made up for it with the pepporoni bread, and she even made a meat free one for me! Go Sarah!! I'm so glad that we all still make a point to get together...lets keep our tradition going for years to come!

Avery Grace visited us today

How lucky I was to babysit Avery Grace today. She was a gem! Olivia took her nap and I got to play with Avery...lucky me! She curled up in a ball and slept on my shoulder. Then Ethel came over and we got to snap a few pics of the girls in matching outfits. Jenn gave Olivia the outfit for her 1st b-day, and bought Avery the same one. I've been wanting to get a pic of them in it together, and without even talking about it we both had the same thought! :) Only Jenn and I would be able to coordinate matching outfits without discussing it first. Avery is such a beauty and I loved having her here.